ADHD paralysis is one of the many banes of my existence.
It’s almost impossible for me to act sometimes, no matter how important or dire a situation may be, and while I struggled with freezing and general executive function paralysis far more in the past than I do now, I still have issues with being able to start, sustain, and complete tasks that I really need to, really should, or even really want to do.
I will say that nothing has helped like medication. And I mean absolutely nothing, because I was 99% certain I had ADHD for months before I had the courage to go in and get diagnosed and medicated.
And in those months, I spent all the time researching that I could. And implementing as many techniques as I could into my life to help me move past the paralysis that plagued so many hours of my days.
But while the medication helps, and is 100% life changing, I still often need far more of a push than the medication will give me. A psychological or mental one usually.
I’m going to outline the 3 most effective tricks that I use to get me out of ADHD Paralysis Mode, and into acting. I may learn new ones or remember old ones and discuss them in later posts, but these are the ones I can come up with right now, and I think I have all my most important ones cover.
I’m going to say – after writing this post I realized all of them were kinda awful. Mostly in terms of not being psychologically healthy for you to keep doing over time. But sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. And life goes on, we gotta do things, we can’t all wait for an invisible muse to strike.
Hopefully there are others that I think of later that are not so unhealthy. But hey. Maybe seeing these options laid out this way will make people realize what they’re doing to themselves and why you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself if you do.
I do these on an often daily basis. It’s not a nice way to live, but I do now get things done. And that’s – to me – infinitely better than being paralyzed for the whole day, getting nothing done, and not being able to enjoy myself all the while. So there’s worse.
Let me know in the comments section if you can think up any more, or if you have actual healthy ones? And maybe if you use these, if you can estimate, how often you might use them in any given day/week. For me, it’s nearly constant for #2 now. #1 I’m trying to only use.. in emergencies 😉
3 Pretty Unhealthy Tricks I Use, but Are Very Effective at Getting Me Out of ADHD Paralysis Mode
1. Negative Self-Talk
This is by far the worst one, but it’s also sadly sometimes the most effective.
I definitely don’t think it’s healthy – or even neutral! – to do. It’s definitely bad for you and should rarely be done, maybe not even ever, but it’s one of the few things that really gets me off my comfy couch with a warm cuddly cat snuggled up in my lap to do the things I know I need to do.
I’ve heard some say that those with ADHD have learned to yell at ourselves when no one is around to do the yelling for us. And often there’s an element of using RSD (rejection sensitive dysphoria) in the self-loathing mix that helps me fuel myself into motion.
I take my shame and all the things I hate about myself – most often all the elements of ADHD that I butt head against on a daily basis, and yell at myself about it to the point where I scare myself into doing what needs to be done.
It’s unhealthy. It’s awful. But it gets things done. So sadly, it’s first on this list and staying in the top spot.
2. I tell myself I don’t have to do anything in particular, I just need to do something.
The biggest ADHD paralysis for me comes when I have something in particular I need to do and I just don’t feel I have the mental wherewithal to do it.
Medication has helped with this. I can now tell the difference between “I don’t want to do this and lack the motivation to act right now” and “I am reticent because I don’t feel I have the mental clarity right now, and so this task feels daunting.”
When I first started medication, I was so excited about it giving me the mental wherewithal to do everything. Brian fog? Gone! Working memory issues? Negligible in comparison to before! Happy while actually in the process of completing a task instead of only being happy at the very end when it’s done (and even then sometimes, I am not happy, just exhausted or overwhelmed). Check!
I was so excited that I could do things that I was burning myself out doing everything possible just because I could. Also because I habitually tried to take advantage of moments of mental clarity when I had no medication, so if I could work and act, I did. Versus with the medication, I could work whenever I was medicated, so I did. And burned myself out.
I’m writing this today with a touch of brain fog, albeit being medicated, and mental and physical exhaustion because I spent the whole day being crazy productive.
But I was only crazy productive yesterday, and on track to be today, because I told myself I could do whatever I wanted. And could ignore what I didn’t want to do…
Which is place an order to a factory for more stock so the online store I jointly own doesn’t get completely sold out without having more boots in the works.
I have the entire order ready. Labels made. Everything finalized. I just don’t want to send it.
But if I try to, I will wipe out my entire day in an anxious ADHD paralysis mode.
So I tell myself I can do whatever I want. I just need to act. To be productive. To do things.
Does it suck because I am literally not prioritizing in any way and just following my whims about and still have all the things I needed to do that I didn’t want to do at the start of the day on my “list” at the end of the day? Hell yes.
And maybe tonight when I’m nearly done the day and have spent the whole morning procrastinating on this one dreaded (for no logical reason) task, I will use a touch of negative self-talk to be the one thing that motivates me to get that one stupid task that takes up 30-80% of my brain space done.
But for now I didn’t waste the entire day thinking about it. Because I know I need more of the first trick, or more of this next trick (or both) to get things I really don’t want to do done…
3. Adrenaline. Panic. Worry. Anxiety. Stress. Deadlines. Procrastination !!!
There is an art to getting things done while you are avoiding another task. It’s an art I’m convinced every single person with ADHD, no matter whether they are diagnosed or not, or whether they are aware of it or not, has developed as a coping mechanism that’s a little bit of a superpower.
Gosh we have a lot of energy. And a lot of oomph and power behind our drive when we are actively avoiding a task that we’re supposed to do.
I can clean the entire house if I’m putting off sending a simple email that I know I have to do and doesn’t really have a deadline.
I can write half a novel if I’m putting off cleaning the house because it’s a mess but there’s no one coming over and so – again, no deadline.
So we master the art of procrastination, and if we’re clever, we add artificial deadlines that work for us (“I cannot possibly wait anther weekend for this email to go out, it has to go out TODAY.”) And if that doesn’t work we sometimes add non-artificial deadlines if/when we can. Like inviting someone over just so we can clean the house? Yeah I would do it. I know a lot of you would, too.
Is it good to constantly use stress and anxiety and raising your blood pressure and cortisol to get anything to happen? Heck no. Does it cause your life – long term – to kind of suck. Yep. Sure does.
But it is what it is. And if it’s a choice between productive panic and procrastination or sitting on the couch all day dreading a task and not doing anything – fun, interesting, exciting, or even boring, repetitive, or annoying – literally nothing done – I choose a life full of stress.
For me – this is the way.
Your Thoughts on Effective ADHD Paralysis Tricks?
Uncovered any effective ways to get out of ADHD paralysis? Use any of these? How often and which ones do you find you default to more?
Are there any you no longer do? Any positive ways you’ve found you can get yourself out of paralysis mode?
Would love to hear any thoughts you have on the topic down below.
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